Beginnings. Endings. Soul Searching. Simple Pleasures. Nostalgia. Strange Coincidences. Life Experiences. Funny Things. Basically, the good stuff.
12.12.2008
yay. boo. yay. friday edition.
Yay: It’s Friday and I fly out to D.C. tomorrow morning. I spend the weekend with my folks and sister, and then will spend Monday in meetings with my company’s local contingent.
Boo: It’s cold, and I’m concerned about the weather wreaking havoc on all of my travel plans.
Yay: for Baja Sol lunches with co-workers on Fridays. And for caffeine-free Diet Coke.
12.11.2008
trading one obnoxious smell for another...
As you may have guessed, this is not a smell I enjoy in the bathroom. There are other smells I also don’t enjoy in a bathroom, and I suppose the orange dreamsicle-ness is better than those, but come on – whatever happened to a neutralizing air freshener?
I love to eat orange dreamsicles in the summertime [insert Mungo Jerry song here], and I’m getting concerned that this whole restroom experience may taint my dreamsicle experience.
I think I’m going to have to travel to other floors in search of a neutral-smelling latrine. Or become the CEO so I can have my own personal bathroom.
This blog is a wonderful illustration of the poster in my previous blog. Mission accomplished.
12.08.2008
in true grumpy monday fashion.
12.07.2008
picks for a sunday afternoon...
Minnesota
Green Bay
Tennessee
Indianapolis
Atlanta
New York (NYG)
Miami
Denver
New York (NYJ)
New England
Arizona
Dallas
Baltimore
Tampa Bay
12.05.2008
i brought it on myself...
On Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday nights of this week, I was in charge of three photo shoots for work (one per night). It was a last minute project and the time to line them up was short. We worked with a FABULOUS photographer from Appleton, and though stressful, the shoots on Tuesday and Wednesday went well. At the end of the evening on Wednesday, I said to the photographer’s assistant, “You know, I was really worried about the first two shoots. The one tomorrow night should be a piece of cake.” As the words were coming out of my mouth I was thinking, “What am I saying?!?! I’m jinxing us! Stop talking. Be quiet, Callie.” But the damage was done. I’d uttered the words.
So, we show up at 4:30 for the final photo shoot, which was a member event at Orchestra Hall in Minneapolis. Members were going to start showing up at 5. At 4:45 p.m., the caterer showed up (15 minutes later than the absolute latest they were supposed to show up) and dropped off the food. As he’s dropping it off, I realize something dreadful: I forgot the plates and the utensils.
Sidenote: It was cold yesterday. 10 degrees.
So, it’s now 4:50 and we need plates. I grabbed my credit card and decided to sprint to Target. Yes. Sprint to Target. 3 blocks. In my dress shoes. In 10 degree weather. With people gathering for Holidazzle.
I made it there, ran through the store, found the plates and silverware, and then began my sprint back. It’s around 5 at this point. As I’m running, I see a small group of people gathered outside the window the WCCO evening news team. So if you saw a blue flash in the crowd while watching the news, it was me. I’m that fast.
I made it back, cold and sweaty, but with plates in tow. The bartender helped me out by setting up.
All in all, it went well. I got to stand backstage with the concert master and the conductor as they waited to go onstage. (Even helped the conductor out with some minor fashion advice – not that I’m all that fashionable.) We got the great shots that we needed. And I survived the three nights of fabulous photo fun.
I’ll be careful with my words from now on, though. Piece of cake, my foot.
12.04.2008
me being real...
Well, it’s not really funny – maybe interesting is a better word choice? Confounding? Confusing? Treacherous?
It really is, though. Almost six months have gone by since Nana passed away. For awhile all of my posts were pretty much consumed with the process of dealing with losing her. I’ve never lost anyone close to me before – and arguably, losing her was like losing a parent because she was so much a part of my life.
And it is still difficult on a daily basis. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of her or want to call her and tell her something. I want to ask her what she thinks about certain things. I miss the way she would calm me down – because I can definitely get worked up.
I think – and this is just a theory (a hypothesis, even) – that until you lose someone close to you, you think you can always go back. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I thought we’d all (Mom, Dad, Griff, Laine/Clay, Candra) end up back in Helena and Nana would move back in with Mom and Dad. It wasn’t a conscious thought, really, because when I actually stop and think about how I had it pictured in my mind, we were back at the house on Ranchview and were all living there together. Obviously that wasn’t realistic. But there was still this notion in my head that I could go back and have things be the way they once were – similar to time travel. As long as everyone was alive, we could always go back. So really, I’m not missing the past, but my vision of what the future looked like changed when Nana passed away. It can never be the same again. We’ll never have another Thanksgiving or Christmas with ‘everyone’ again.
So anyway… back to grief. It’s odd to me how I can think about some random thing and think of Nana. And how when that happens, I miss her and grief just overcomes me. The occurrences have lessened, definitely, from a couple of months ago. But I just miss her. It’s indescribable and unfathomable.
The holidays make me think of her. They remind me of her.
This blog sounds depressing – it’s not meant to be. I don’t feel depressed. I just feel sad – and that’s part of life on earth. If we didn’t experience grief how would we appreciate joy?
12.03.2008
who are you?
--Marianne Williamson
12.01.2008
guess he's not immature anymore...
Could it be his Forbes magazine subscription? His impending membership at the Rod and Gun Club? Perhaps his affinity for old man hats? Or baggy britches? The fact that he gets his hair cut at Great Clips? Too many police officers have clocked him going under the speed limit with his left turn signal flashing for miles at a time? His poor eyesight? His old lady (me)?
He says it arose from cruising for old ladies online.
I really have no idea where this came from. But I find it funny.
11.28.2008
it's time...
From the New York Sun, 1897:
We take pleasure in answering thus prominently the communication below, expressing at the same time our great gratification that its faithful author is numbered among the friends of The Sun:
Dear Editor—
I am 8 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus. Papa says, “If you see it in The Sun, it’s so.” Please tell me the truth, is there a Santa Claus?
Virginia O’Hanlon
Virginia, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men’s or children’s, are little. In this great universe of ours, man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.
Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus! It would be as dreary as if there were no Virginias. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.
Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies. You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if you did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that’s no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.
You tear apart the baby’s rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived could tear apart. Only faith, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, Virginia, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.
No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives and lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay 10 times 10,000 years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.
11.27.2008
a thanksgiving adventure
11.26.2008
quirks
Here’s the thing. For those of you who have had the opportunity to live with me or near me, you know that I’m not always the most organized person in the world. I think it’s my artistic nature to be scattered. I live better that way. I can’t really explain it. But, I am very obsessive about certain things. I organize the candies that I eat by number and color. This is odd. If I set a table, I need the silverware to be uniform in how it's set around the plates. I’ve been project manager for a couple of events at work, and at those events we’ve had three or four items to give away. I was perfectly obsessive about the way they were placed on the chairs. The position and angle had to be just so and also had to be uniform throughout the auditorium. You wouldn’t expect this from me, would you? I surprise myself sometimes.
So, my latest discovery is this: I need my to-go coffee cup to be perfectly aligned before I can drink from it.
*A siren is the creature in the Starbucks logo

I know what you’re thinking. Yes, I have issues. We all do. Love me anyway.
11.24.2008
i'm a pc... and i'm a mac
- (Delete Key) - You know, the one that allows you to place the cursor in front of the letters or words you want to delete instead of backspacing? I miss that little key. Is there anything that compares to it on a Mac?
- (Right-clicking) - I keep right-clicking EVERYTHING to get details about it -- and it's not working. Blast. This could be harder to get used to than I thought.
- (Microsoft Word) - Microsoft has convinced me that there is no program comparable to Word. When I need to write something, I keep opening Finder and looking for Word. Where are you, Word? I miss you. Please return to me.
- (Built-in Camera) - Is it on now? Is it always on? Can you all see me right now? Worse, can you see the wretched picture I was forced to take of myself in the set-up process? Help!
- (iChat) - When is this program on? Again, can people see me? Can they hear me? Will my vocal stylings soon be infamous? Seriously, help.
- (Control + v,p,c,x, etc.) - Is the 'control + whatever' function no longer valid?
11.20.2008
subtle hints...
Some background info helpful for understanding this post:
- I park in an underground garage at our condo (which is good, because it gets downright frigid in the MN winters).
- The parking in the underground garage is assigned.
- The person(s) assigned to the spot to the left of me likes to park on the line (as evidenced in this picture).
So, about two weeks ago, I pulled into my parking spot and noticed they were missing a hubcap. The next day Ryan happened to be with me and he also commented on the missing hubcap. Last week, I observed that a second hubcap was missing on the same side of the car, just a different tire. It makes me wonder where these people are driving/parking to lose hubcaps. Thankfully, I still have all of mine.
So, my dilemma – I’m debating leaving a note on this person’s windshield that reads, “Dearest neighbor: I appreciate your peace bumper sticker. I’m sure you’re a very nice person, and I’ve noticed your car is always impeccably clean. I’ll quit stealing your hubcaps if you quit parking over the line. Love, your neighbor.”
11.19.2008
confessions
Here's the truth: I am afraid of being outside in the country in the dark. I know, I know. I’m 27 years old. I shouldn’t be afraid of such trivial things. But I am. And now that the time has fallen back an hour, I’m daily confronted with my fear of the dark when going out riding. The horses are in a big pasture, requiring me to walk around, getting close enough to each horse to see if it’s my horse – in the pitch black darkness. Sometimes Baron helps out and meets me halfway… but most of the time he doesn’t.
So, what am I afraid of in the dark? (This is where it gets a little weird. Don’t think less of me, please.)
I’m afraid of skunks, foxes, coyotes, bears and slipping and getting trampled by all the horses. Obviously some of these fears are irrational. Most of them are irrational. (I’m hoping that my public confession will help me overcome them.)
Many of these can be related to my childhood in Deer Lodge. Skunks and foxes were always getting into the chicken coop and destroying all of the chickens (a regular bloodbath). If they did that to a chicken, what would they do to me? There was a rabid coyote that got too close for comfort one day in Deer Lodge, too. The bear fear comes from watching Night of the Grizzly at a young age – an age when I couldn’t tell the difference between poorly constructed mechanical grizzlies and the real thing. And the whole slipping and getting trampled must have something to do with an icy slope and resulting broken collarbone in kindergarten.
The silver lining? Once I’ve actually retrieved Baron and made it safely back to the light of the barn, the adrenaline high lasts for a good 10 minutes.
I know; it’s a dangerous life I lead.
11.17.2008
a little taste of mt…
Ry and I enjoyed the live show tremendously. Good music – a rock/country hybrid – combined with funny, clever lyrics. Think Brad Paisley on Grain Belt Premium. They played my favorites like Little Miss Perfect, I Make My Own Money, Alright Tonight and Hit Me Baby One Mor--wait a minute. That's not a favorite, but it was funny to hear them play it. I'm wondering if I Make My Own Money can stretch as far as buying a horse? I think it can.
Can it get any better?
Actually, it can get better – we got there early and I was happy to find John at the bar, chatting it up with a couple of other Montanans. So I marched myself over and said hey. It is so nice to talk to people from Montana. Seriously. Just talking to them made me feel closer to home. And Montana will always be home.
The only downfall of the evening – and I do mean downfall – was walking up to make a request and slipping on the way back to my seat. Ugh. Who does that? Me, that’s who. Some kind folks assured me no one saw. It’s funny to look around at the faces of those around you when you’re falling – it’s this sort of ‘oh my gosh, she’s falling’ look combined with a ‘glad it’s not me’ look and finished off with a chuckle. My ankle does feel better today – the swelling has gone down, and it’s not quite as bruised.
So, my parting thoughts:
- Check out The Clintons.
- Watch your step.
- Hug a Montanan.
11.13.2008
decisions, decisions.
It was such a freeing time. I didn’t have a care in the world – everything was a possibility. I had nothing to lose and everything to gain.
And now I look at my life and some of opportunities and decisions coming up and wonder what I’ll decide. Some require money, some require time, some require confidence, all require humility – and all of them require change. What happened to the girl who moved to Minneapolis over four years ago? She grew up. She faced her adult life and all its responsibilities. She made a living and got married. She found some things that could be lost. She experienced loss. And that changes every decision.
11.12.2008
tonight's the night...
I have to run out to the barn tonight to see Baron, but you can bet my DVR is set to record and I will be tuning in as soon as I get home.
11.10.2008
retired and renamed
Justin McBride was one of my favorite bullriders to watch. He was consistently good, with a good attitude. Seemed like a genuinely nice guy. I’ll miss watching him.
Here's Justin riding a bull named Chicken on a Chain.
In other news, I’ve renamed our cat. Formerly known as Rory, her new name is Troubadour Chicken on a Chain, in honor of two bulls – Troubadour and Chicken on a Chain.
11.06.2008
green sprees
Lime, on the other hand, is sublime. It’s refreshing and enjoyable.
These are just some thoughts running through my head today.
11.04.2008
vote for… Ross Perot?
So, at 7 a.m. this morning I decide I’m going to go vote. I go to the old precinct where I used to be registered to vote (and that corresponds to the address on my driver’s license) to place my tally next to one of the candidates – only I find out that I’m not registered there anymore. Stupid post office change of address forms. After waiting in line for 45 minutes, I tell the registration people that I’ll have to vote later, because I’m not going to lie to them and tell them that I currently live at the address on my license. And I’m not going to commit voter fraud.
I hop in my car, drive to the DMV, and get my license updated. Then I drive to the polling place that corresponds with my NEW address, and get in line to vote. Thankfully the line was short, and a mere 15 minutes later I was on my merry way.
While voting, I had a couple of observations:
Observation 1: It would be very easy to commit voter fraud and vote twice. I thought of several ways I could have done that today. But I didn’t. I hope no one else did, either. WE EACH GET ONE VOTE! :)
Observation 2: While waiting in line at the first voting place, I overheard three loud young men discussing their dislike of both candidates. Then one said, “Dude, I wish Ross Perot was running.” To which his friend said, “Yeah, he’s definitely who we need. The only problem is that he was rich and was all concerned about his oil. But he could dig our economy out.” I wanted to respond with, “Seriously? Ross Perot? That’s so 1992.” But I bit my tongue.
Observation 3: Voting for state supreme court justices takes a really long time. And I have no idea who I voted for. Is this really a good use of our democratic process? I was tempted to write in Ryan's name. Maybe in 2012.
Observation 4: Voting facilities for the rich are a lot more pleasant than those for the poor.
11.03.2008
it's been 23 days since my mom left...
So, quick updates:
1) Had a great time with my mom. We shopped, ate, shopped, giggled, shopped, saw Baron, and shopped some more. The weekend came to an end though, when she had to fly home on my birthday and I got sick.
2) My old roommate, Kasea, came to visit the following weekend, and it was great to spend some time with her and my friend Rachael Ramy. We went to an apple orchard where they tried to rip us off by charging $35 (yes – thirty-five dollars) for a normal-sized bag of apples. Ridiculous. Rachael and Kasea also go to meet Baron, which was fun.
3) I’ve been avoiding the political scene as much as possible. Is it just me or is this election worse than previous year’s? Wish there was a candidate that I liked; sadly, I’m not fond of either.
The rest of my time has been spent with the new love of my life, Baron. (He’s a close-second to the first love of my life, Ryan.)
I can’t believe Thanksgiving is almost upon us. I’m looking forward to the holidays, but am also a little melancholic when I remember that Nana won’t be there this year. Can’t wait for the time when we’re all reunited.
Look for more regular posts coming soon... :)
10.06.2008
four days until...
And, I'll now make a quick confession to this brief little blog post: I really like Taylor Swift's new song. I'm not a big Taylor Swift fan... but I LOVE her song Love Story.
10.02.2008
time for an update...
9.18.2008
i drink when i think...
What I'm trying to say is -- I can't think unless I've got a drink in my hands. Preferably water or a decaf coffee substance. I realized this yesterday as I was getting ready to tackle a big, thinking project at work and suddenly had to run get a latte before I could continue. This is strange, isn't it?
Nonetheless, it's still something that I'm recognizing as a pattern. And really, of all the habits to have, this isn't a bad one, is it? At least I didn't blog and say, "In order to think a project/issue through, I need a shot of tequila and a beer chaser."
That would explain a lot, though.
9.12.2008
in response...
This question also came from my husband when I ordered a 'decaf triple sugar-free vanilla non-fat latte' at Starbucks. "Why did you get an extra shot if you ordered decaf?" he asked as we shelled out the extra fifty cents for my seemingly ridiculous -- and worthless -- extra shot of coffee.
Well, my friends -- this is the answer. Unlike many people in the world today who consume coffee and shots of espresso to keep their eyelids open, I drink coffee because I like the way it tastes. And even if there is no decaf in it, it still tastes marvelously, wonderously delicious. I get the extra shot of decaf coffee because I love the added coffee flavor. Yummy.
I've been off caffeine for several months now. I got tired of those caffeine headaches if I couldn't get a bit of caffeine in my system. Plus, if I'm not drinking pop, it's a good excuse to give up caffeine too.
And that, my friends, is the answer to why I spend lots of money just to buy decaf lattes.
9.11.2008
dangling my feet off the edge of the wagon...
I'm not ready to say that I've fallen off the wagon for good yet, but I will say that I'm dangling my feet of the wagon. I did jump off the wagon and am walking beside it right now as I drink my Diet Dr. Pepper. I'll jump back up on the wagon as soon as I finished it. Ah, self-discipline. You've escaped me yet again.
On another note, I realized something depressing today as I was paying for my lunch. I paid $3.92 the morning for a medium decaf, sugar free vanilla, skim latte this morning from Caribou. I paid $3.76 for a delicious lunch of a huge ham and cheese omelette, hashbrowns and a big bowl of fruit. I'm right to be disturbed at the price of the coffee, right? Especially in comparison to the price of my lunch. I feel kinda sheepish for actually buying lattes.
Drip coffee it is. I'll hop on that wagon, too.
9.10.2008
five minutes...
I think I'll just blog about how quickly the week is going... and how quickly time is going. September 15 would have been Nana's 86th birthday. It also will be three months from the day she went home. I can't believe it's been that long. I feel like it's been forever since I've talked to her, but it still hurts so much to think about losing her. At least I know I'll see her again, and that thought is so very comforting.
I love the fall -- I just remember telling Nana the last time she was here (in Feb, when it was REALLY cold) that she'd have to come out in the fall when the leaves start to change because it's so beautiful. She thought that sounded like a wonderful idea... and now here I am. Fall without Nana. It's kinda sad.
But I suppose that's life. If there wasn't heartache there wouldn't be joy. And if their wasn't pain we wouldn't have to hope for the future.
Wow... those are deep thoughts for a three minute post. My meeting is about to start.
9.05.2008
a night i didn't expect...
We tried to get through into the convention area, but weren't able to because we didn't have credentials. SO, we walked. A long way. As in, a VERY long way. I was in 4-inch heels; but I survived. Anyway, when we finally got close, we saw Rudy Giuliani being interviewed by Chris Matthews. It was pretty sweet.
We finally made it through the crowd to the Science Museum and were walked to the front doors by the secret service. We were hanging out, having free drinks and food, and basically just enjoying ourselves. The Star Wars exhibit was open for us, so we went down to check it out. It was alright. I'm sure for real Star Wars fans it would have been amazing. But I'm not a real Star Wars fan, so it was lost on me.
Anyway, we went back upstairs and were standing at a table when two guys came over to chat with us. One of them was from Germany, and the other lives in D.C. BUT, he's from Belgrade, Montana. Small world, huh? He asked if we were going over to the convention later, and I said that we didn't have tickets. He said he had two extra for his suite. At that point, I wanted to do a happy dance, but I just maintained my cool.
So, we went through the serious security and made our way into the suite. Which just happened to be right next to Tom Brokaw. I could see him on air; he was on the air with someone else, but I don't remember who. We also saw Joe Gibbs (love him), Sean Hannity, Alan Colmes, Shephard Smith, Mike Huckabee, Bill Frist, Tom Ridge, Cindy McCain, Sarah Palin, and of course, John McCain. We also saw two Code Pink women get arrested.
It was neat to be there to hear McCain's nomination acceptance speech. I still don't know who I'm voting for, but being there was an experience I won't forget, and it was also one I found valuable.
The moral of this story is always -- I repeat, ALWAYS -- wear a nice suit if you're in doubt about what to wear. Always. You'll never be sorry.
9.04.2008
i found this funny...
9.03.2008
happy birthday!!!!



